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If You’re the Side Chick and You Get Pregnant, Would You Abort it For His Happiness?

Ever had a situation where you felt yourself making a tough decision based off someone else’s happiness without putting yours first? Well, I received a nice juicy email earlier this week from a nice young lady who wanted to put her story out there. Take a look and comment your thoughts!

I was with a man for 2 years… we were never official however. We were always on the DL.. reason being with that was because he had an ex that he was still on and off with. he told me upfront he did not want anything serious, but of course my feelings got the best of me. Looking back if you ask me, I don’t believe they had ever ended. In the beginning, I knew all about her, she didn’t know about me. My main mentality was “well they are not together” and that mentality did nothing but bite me at the end of the day…

Over the whole course of it all, once she did find out about me I’d say 1 year into all of this, it was BAD.. we were always beefing over social media, we even fought TWICE.. I would call her phone… I am woman to now admit it, I would low key harass her and make up so many lies just to break them apart just to get her out the picture and I know, you probably are asking why was I still fucking with this nigga.. I believed every single word this man told me.. he told me he wasn’t fucking with this girl.. she was crazy! They were over years ago.. and I would use it to my advantage each time me and this girl had an exchange of words. He fucked with PLENTY other females, I did not care however, she was my main competition and I wanted HER out the picture.  This year was when things really went downhill.. I began to notice we weren’t spending as much time together anymore, there were times when I even would pop up when my calls weren’t answered and I would find her there.. I broke all of it off right then and there! I was so tired of being in the closet, a “side bitch” when there were really niggas out here willing to give me more than what he clearly was giving me! I kid you not, 2 weeks later I found out I was pregnant. It took me 2 months to come out and even tell this man that I was having his child, my worse mistake was putting it on social media. Of course, she found out and confronted him. Then that’s when he came and confronted me.. He told me upfront he wasn’t ready, he even had doubts of it being his as well. Which was understandable now that I look back because even when he did his dirt, I was doing mines…. BUT I knew he was my child’s father. It grew so out of control, I began to lose myself. I would manipulate this man. I told him if he still talked to this girl, he could not see his kid, I even begged this man to sign over his rights. a couple weeks later, I find out his ex is pregnant.. the one who was “so crazy!” The one “he hadn’t fucked with in years”!!!! I was so furious and hurt.. I later found myself telling this man that I miscarried just to dead all this shit…

I lied about a miscarriage for over a month until i finally came out and told this man it was all a lie.. I was still pregnant.. Over that time we did not speak. He was busy trying to make things right with his ex.. during that time, I decided that I wanted an abortion. Looking back, I can say I did not think things thoroughly.. I just wanted it done to get this fool out of my life. I had trouble coming up with the money at first (because it was all last minute) .. and he had JUST lost his job.. funny thing is, his EX coughed up the money for my abortion. I literally watched her pull up to hand him the money for MY ABORTION then pull off.. I was so sick to my stomach I could not wait for this to be over!!!  He went to my appointment with me asked me “was I sure this was what I wanted to do”.. stayed during the consultation, to later leave and come get me once it was over.. He helped me out the car and walked me in my house to make sure I was good.. then left. I didn’t hear from him for 4 months… I no longer could have this strong mindset, I just wanted to know WHY? He couldn’t even give me that.. his defense was always “i understand my mistakes, I was a fuck up.. but after you lied about the miscarriage in the first place to fuck with my head.. I cannot look at you the same. I understand I fucked with your head, but you manipulated me on a whole different level” I  was shocked! YOU manipulated me for 2 YEARS! Now you are just so hurt.. To this day I still hurt.. I am in a different relationship he knows all about this story, and to this day he stays by my side even when I just need a shoulder to cry on or just vent about it.., personally I am still in love with that man after everything he put me thru… And him, well I tend to creep from time to time, he is happily engaged now with the girl, and she is expected to pop this month.. so ironic to me.. I guess I did make a decision to make him happy, but everyday I regret it…

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3 thoughts on “If You’re the Side Chick and You Get Pregnant, Would You Abort it For His Happiness?

  1. & after all he put her through… she is still risking her relationship with a good man to fuck with this lame! Girl shake the dust off your shoulders & ✌?✌?

  2. I was in the same situation but I kept my child. I was not going to risk my life or my child’s because he chose to lie. My daughter is definitely a blessing and he is so in love with her. I always roll eyes because he was so adamant about me having an abortion but I almost died doing one and almost lost my uterus. I was willing to accept my responsibility because I did not know of his situation. In his eyes he is in an open relationship because his woman knows even though he still lives with her. He has been with her for 6 years but he has a 3 year old son also. I think she is just there for companionship though because she is his “sugar mama” because I didn’t notice the signs. We would go out together, he introduced me to his friends, I met his family. I slept by him and vice versa. I chose not to be in any situation-ship with him because we have a child together and that is not the type of relationship I want my daughter perceiving as “normal”. I just got counselling it was very therapeutic because I had unresolved issues from my last relationship that made me cling to this one and did not notice the signs. Just become busy investing in yourself and knowing your worth.

  3. Op you need to get some self esteem together and never repeat this mistake again. Why are you settling for men who refuse to be faithful? What are you looking for in a relationship? The guy was sleeping with everyone yet you were FIGHTING over him. Set higher standards for yourself

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