Knowing When To GET OUT!

An Akron man goes live on Face Book and his caption was “omw to (a popular wing restaurant) to snatch a bitch by her hair.”

I was conflicted on posting this blog because it can be very embarrassing to the people involved. Well I really don’t care how he feels because

• (1) he is the one who went live. I was tagged a few times in the video, and 5 people also sent it to my inbox.
• (2) he had no business, and no right to put his hands on her like that… even though we cannot see anything, it truly broke my heart to hear her scream like that saying how “he is always hurting her”… he needs his ass kicked!!!
• (3) to raise awareness about domestic violence

But I have removed his face from the video, because like I said… he went live and initially the camera was on his face, and I have also removed his face book name. I will not put the girl’s name out there… because yes they sent me her name too (I did try to reach out to her, but she has deleted her page and so has he).

We need to stop laughing and joking about Domestic Violence, and making it “okay” in certain instances and for certain people. ~Brittney Miller

But as I said… I do want to talk about Domestic Violence from the perspective of the friend watching their loved one go through the BS. It is very hard to just sit back and watch somebody you love go through being physically and/or mentally abused (I am going to put more focus on the physical side because of the video below.)

It’s not fair that you expect your friend to be there for you while somebody is hurting you. It is not fair that you expect your friend to just sit back and do nothing, especially when situations can get so bad, you risk losing your life or having to take their life (trying to defend yourself).

I know they say “a woman/man is not going to get out of a bad domestic violence situation until they’re ready to”… which I’m pretty sure is true. But could you really live with yourself if something happened to your friend & you knew what they were going through, but you just chose to sit back and do nothing?? I don’t think I could.

Almost 20 years ago, a friend of mine was sentenced to 17 years for killing her boyfriend (who she loved very much) because he was physically abusive towards her. Not only did he lose his life, but she lost a huge part of hers too. She had to grow up in prison and she had to watch her son grow up without her.

The video is posted below, but 1st I wanted to give you guys the warning signs that you or somebody you love may be in a bad situation & how to handle it if you are in that situation.

Some of the signs of an abusive relationship include a partner who:

• Tells you that you can never do anything right
• Shows extreme jealousy of your friends and time spent away
• Keeps you or discourages you from seeing friends or family members
• Insults, demeans or shames you with put-downs
• Controls every penny spent in the household
• Takes your money or refuses to give you money for necessary expenses
• Looks at you or acts in ways that scare you
• Controls who you see, where you go, or what you do
• Prevents you from making your own decisions
• Tells you that you are a bad parent or threatens to harm or take away your children
• Prevents you from working or attending school
• Destroys your property or threatens to hurt or kill your pets
• Intimidates you with guns, knives or other weapons
• Pressures you to have sex when you don’t want to or do things sexually you’re not comfortable with
• Pressures you to use drugs or alcohol

Now if you paid attention to the beginning of the video, you hear how “friendly & cordial” he is with the other man he is talking to outside of the car. As soon as he gets in the car with her and makes her close the door, that’s when he turns into a demon. It’s usually the men who don’t want any beef or any smoke with another man, but will beat their woman’s ass at the drop of a dime. I really feel sorry for the woman in this video, and I pray this situation opens her eyes to the fact it is time to GET THE FUCK OUT of that situation. You are too good for that. You set the standards for how somebody is supposed to treat you.

You may need to help you friend or loved one come up with a “safety plan.” A safety plan is a personalized, practical plan that includes ways to remain safe while in a relationship, planning to leave, or after you leave. Safety planning involves how to cope with emotions, tell friends and family about the abuse, take legal action and more.

For more information, check out the >>>> National Domestic Violence Hotline, they have tons of resources available on their page.